Something I realized

I never really touched the iPod in the last year it has graced our household. My sister gave it to Sri and from the first day it has been his. I like music but I used to drive down and listen to FM in our car and Sri got to rough the city traffic with his bike and iPod was a welcome companion. The guy even took some Spanish lessons in it, when I thought we were working on it together! Cheater!

Even after our roles reversed and I had to take the company shuttle as driving or car-pooling wasn’t a great option (more so when I am pregnant), Sri even offered the iPod, but I turned it down as I dozed off in the shuttle and didn’t quite feel the necessity. After the long time of neglecting the iPod I put on the music for the first time last night. The entire stuff was Sri’s – his music, his Spanish lessons. And that’s what I got a glimpse of. A bit more of Sri – something which I knew existed, I loved but had ignored long enough to admit and appreciate. I wondered where I had missed seeing the big picture and started looking at only the daily mundane things like… put this here, do something this way, put that there – why won’t you ever listen, grow up – you get the drift. I mean, I see so many other blogs and I know the same things happen between many couples. The wife appears to be the one nagging. As I sat there listening to the music, the fights we’ve had flashed across – I’ve and still fight for some ‘more’ time with him, fight against the priority his guy friends get on many occasions, silly fights, ego blasts – what not. I look like a (lovesick?) bitch when I say I can’t get enough of him, but sometimes just don’t want him around at all so I can get some sanity.

The music was a lot like the Sri I knew before we married. There was ‘Lajjavathiye’ , followed by ‘Aaj jaane ki zid na karo’ and then came a lot of Ilaiyaraja numbers – for the true Tam he is – and there were some of my favorites too. I remembered GILU – the music collection he had created for us to waltz around. It was like reading a page of Sri all over again. I rolled over and saw him sleep peacefully with my daughter’s cute little arms around his neck. Much of this guy was still the same. And he was still the romantic and I was still not-so-there. But I love him – for what he was and what he is. For all that he dares to do and has done. I presume he knows this. Just so he knows, all over again. Sri, I love you.

Aditi would say, I love you, kanna!